Sick kids and playdates…seriously??

OK…I am a bit annoyed. Maybe it’s just me and you can let me know if I am being overly critical. My son had planned on a buddy coming over today to hang out. He arrived on time and his mom walked in the house announcing that “he is a bit under the weather, he was a little sick on Saturday, actually very sick on Saturday, but totally fine yesterday. The Dr said he wasn’t contagious. He’s just a little tired today…..” yada yada yada…What??? Seriously?? What am I supposed to say while he is standing right there? Why don’t you guys go home and we’ll plan for another time? First off, if your child isn’t feeling all that well, why would you send him to a friends house? Wouldn’t you want him to relax and get better?? I am so hypersensitive to this and respectful when my kids are sick. I would never send them to a friends house, even if the Dr said he wasn’t contagious anymore. So, I basically suggested that we just shorten the playdate from 4 hours to 2 1/2. Am I in the wrong? Do you feel the same way? Please share here and let me know what you would have done. Ugh…

11 Responses to Sick kids and playdates…seriously??

  1. No, you’re not wrong. That is annoying. What probably happened was the kid was sick on Saturday, thus home all day. The mom was pulling her hair out taking care of the sick kid for two days. She likely just needed a break, so she brought her kid over to your house. Not fun.

  2. Agree on both comments. As bad as it sucks to keep your kiddo home, getting that rest is the best medicine. I know I always feel a million times better when I don’t overdo it, and rest, when I’m sick. And kids don’t know to say “no mom, I want to stay home in my jammies”.

    • I totally agree! I am so in tune with my body and know when I just need to chill and do absolutely nothing. I have taught my kids the importance of relaxing when they don’t feel so hot. They appreciate when I am the one to say “no thank you” to a playdate instead of them having to do it:) And then they always feel better in the long run.

  3. That “was sick, but getting better” line is a tough one for making decisions on school, etc, but I do feel it is disrespectful to bring a sick kid to someone’s house without a warning call or giving you the opportunity to opt out before they arrive. It’s also better to slow down and let your kiddo recover before pushing them back out into the world.

  4. What Marie said. Contagion is just one of the issues. The other is, do you WANT to take care of an under-the-weather child? She should have given you a heads up and a choice.

    But lacking that, you were very gracious in merely shortening the play date. If I’d been feeling gutsy, I’d have said, “Sounds like this isn’t the best time for a play day. Which day next week is clear for you? I’m happy to reschedule.”

  5. If the kid isn’t sick there’s no need to mention it. Clearly the mom still thought the kid was sick. Which means she should have cancelled the play date. I don’t even like when moms call and say “Well Billy’s been sick so it’s up to you if you don’t want us to come over.” That makes you the bad guy. Sometimes as a parent you will have to make difficult choices that don’t make you popular with your kid – like canceling play dates.

  6. I am like you, when my children are sick, I don’t go places with them. I hate when I take my little guy to the preschool and there are kids that are clearly sick. I think you did the right thing by asking to shorten the playdate. That was a tough position to put you in. Either way, I hope your little one didn’t end up under the weather.

  7. I have called and asked the mom before if I should still bring my daughter over if she’s been sick. Like others have said, it gives them the chance to ask to reschedule. My kid never slows down, even when sick, so it’s always hard to tell when she’s actually over something. Or under something. So, I warn regardless and leave it up to the other person to decide. I don’t blame you either for shortening the playdate.

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